James Cameron is already holding the top two spots in the largest selling movies of all time. Avatar wears the crown with nearly $750 million and Titanic sinks just beneath at $600 million, but Cameron wants to make sure no one comes along to challenge him. This weekend, Cameron is re-releasing Avatar in 800+ 3D theaters throughout the country.
This isn’t just a simple replay though. The new version of Avatar sports an extra 8-9 minutes to the already ridiculous two and a half hour running time. Whether or not you plan on seeing this in theaters again depends on a lot of factors, but I’ve done some digging and have uncovered what you can expect to see from the added footage. Spoiler Alert: none of it looks very interesting.
I will probably go see this with my daughter because we didn’t see it in 3D the first time around. I don’t think it’s a good film, but I can’t deny that it’s gorgeous, and I feel like I’d be missing out to not see it in the theaters with those silly glasses on. However, if I had already seen it in 3D I would have no desire to see it again. It’s too long, too silly, and the promise of 9 more minutes of footage deemed too useless for the first release doesn’t sound very appetizing. This is a James Cameron movie though, and he is well known for cutting great scenes out of his movies to accommodate film standards. For instance, in Aliens he cut a scene showing how Ripley had lost a child, which is an important bit of backstory that helps explain the way she latches onto Newt when the child first appears. So maybe Avatar will have similar scenes that they just couldn’t manage to pack into the first release’s 162 minutes. Here’s what I’ve been able to find out about the new footage.
- The majority of the new scenes seem to be slightly extended scenery views that help explore more of Pandora. These are the scenes you expect to see in extended director’s cuts. They are the pretty, but useless clips that are the first to get shortened because they do nothing to move the plot along and instead are used to set a mood.
Grace, Norm, and Jake visit a Na’vi school and we learn that Grace had been trying to teach the natives about humans by reading the Dr Seuss’ book, The Lorax. The scene just sounds dumb and deserved to be cut.
- You’ll get a voice-over explanation of the science behind the floating rocks that litter the skies in Pandora. This actually sounds intriguing as I can’t fathom how that can be technically and rationally explained, despite the fact that fantasy worlds have sported floating islands since the beginning of the genre.
- The Na’vi get a chance to retaliate after their big tree is knocked down. They go in and burn down some of the human’s equipment, which sounds mildly interesting.
- You’ll get to watch Jake ritualistically murder Tsut’sey, which means nothing to me. I guess it has some meaning to people that got really wrapped up into the world of Pandora and the culture of the Na’vi, but I can barely remember who the hell Tsut’sey is anyhow.
- And finally, you’ll get to watch the much anticipated sex scene between Jake and Neytiri. If watching two blue Night Elves get off by rubbing their ponytails together is something you don’t think you can live without seeing, then, well… you have some serious sexual issues that you need to talk through with a professional. For me, it sounds goofy and totally unnecessary.
And there you have it. Are those scenes worth spending the money on seeing this again? Probably not, but if you are among the millions of people who say that Avatar is a movie experience that must be enjoyed in a theater in 3D, then you might as well take advantage of seeing this one again. I agree that Avatar is a marvelous technical achievement and is better then the majority of the junk they’ve shoveled down our throats this summer. Just don’t tell me about how sexy the Na’vi hair-porn is. I don’t want to hear it.
[rokbox title="Na'vi Sex" thumb="http://talkingship.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Navi-Sex.png" size="854 505" album="demo"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0D8IRIYBSnk[/rokbox]