On The Rocks – Bad Romance

November 2, 2010 | MuttonChop 3

If you answered “A group of men singing it in ‘a capella’, I’m going to have to ask you to kindly stop spying on me…Read More

Sexy CPR

October 11, 2010 | MuttonChop 1

..if I’d learned CPR this way, I’m pretty damn sure I’d remember everything… EVERYTHING about it.Read More

Why Are They Raping My Childhood?

September 15, 2010 | David 12

Why in God’s name is Hollywood doing this to me? I used to love my childhood memories. Sitting around on Saturday morning, eating a big bowl of my favorite cereal, in charge of the remote because I the oldest (and the meanest) all the while allowing my mind to be shaped by animated characters. Now Hollywood has pretty much killed of all original ideas and has set its sights on those precious memories.

I used to watch Yogi Bear and the Smurfs and laugh at what I thought passed for jokes at that time. Now these are being made into live action movies. If they turn out to be as mentally scarring as the Marmaduke and Garfield movies, my childhood will be all but lost.  Even a cartoon with a decent premise was messed up so badly that I literally left the theatre and kicked my car tires in frustration. (I’m looking at you, G.I. Joe)

What makes this memory-rape all the more painful is the fact that these evil bastards appear to be purposefully skipping some of the greatest cartoons of the 80’s. So, without further adieu, here is my list of the top three cartoons that should be given a live action treatment.

He-Man and the Masters of the Universe

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