Let’s say you’ve never played a video game before and you decide today’s the day to change that. You’re all geared up and you choose a game that looks totally awesome. You make your way through the introduction and now it appears that you’re going to get a companion in the game. You think you’ve struck gold. Heck yeah, a minion! Halfway through the first mission with your companion you’re trying to kill your newfound minion yourself. That’s because your companion falls into one of the categories of Video Game Companion Suckage.