Pat Robertson needs to fall over dead with a dick in his mouth.

I’m not calling for anyone to kill him, but rather evoking the might of all the demons and devils that must accompany my every walking step to jump in and either make his heart explode or simply pull his tongue out, or zipper his mouth shut ala Beetlejuice.  Why such ire from me?  Well, it has to do with his dumbass remarks regarding the devastating earthquake in Haiti.

Today, Pat declared on his television program (The 700 Club – aka How Many Reasons Do We Need To Give You To Cancel This Show?) that the reason an earthquake hit Haiti, killing an estimated 100,000+ people, was because they made a pact with the devil.  WTF??!

Pat says that in the 19th century, Haitians made a pact with the devil to defeat the French Colonizers.  Wow.  Patty boy, you’re a douche.

I’m not evoking the dark power of the devils that chill on the ship ONLY because of this comment, but rather because this is the straw that broke the back.  It was Patty Boy that said the reason New Orleans got hit with a hurricane was because of legalized abortion.  He’s a world class assface, and its about time the devil stepped up and put a dick in his mouth. 

I also feel comfortable in calling forth Beelzebub because I dont think he really exists.  Shame though, cause in times like these it would be nice to be able to count on a nasty devil to stick a dick or two in the mouths of the douches that try to take advantage of tragedies like this.