That’s right, gentlemen, the time has come for you to get those teabags Sparklingly Clean!  With brand new, Eier-Shampoo (Eier means Balls, Nuts, Testicles, or Eggs) you can make sure your downstairs hangers don’t smell like taint-flavored-kielbasas anymore! 

Lather up new Eier-Shampoo in your hands or in a washcloth, then simply massage the foam all over your drooping prunes until you feel the tingle!

Actual User Reaction: “Wow, my balls are tingling!  With these clean balls there’s NOTHING that can stand in my way!”

Don’t waste any more time!  Get your balls to the nearest quality pharmacy and buy your way into CLEAN BALL NIRVANA with Eier-Shampoo!

Also, look for new Chocolate-Flavored Eier-Shampoo, for that discerning lover who wants to gargle some bon-bons.